When I say ‘done properly’, I mean giving them a confident yet relaxed, mischievous smile. You know the type I mean, like you are doing something a little bit naughty but that it’s clever at the same time, like butter wouldn’t melt in your mouth. What I don’t mean is a completely over the top, fake smile. The important word to remember is ‘subtle’.On the other hand, many of these brief first coffee dates may go on for hours, when two people find a camaraderie and connection that draw them together. This is not different from other meetings with an unknown person or a blind date set up before the internet was established. Such meetings were just as difficult.